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This article was originally written on 3/21/2011 on my other blog http://www.fatherof4.com.

Have you ever get mad and snap at a kid for doing or saying something wrong to realize later that you could have done your part differently.  This is one of the issues that can make a father or parent a good or bad parent.  Keeping your self-control around your kids will teach them how to be a good parent as well as teaching them how to handle conflicts in their lives.

Teaching kids to control their tempers and actions is the first step to a happy and healthy childhood.  Losing your self-control will only show your kids that it’s ok to lose your temper and yell if there is a conflict in their lives.  This also leads to fights and bad behavior at school as well as in everyday life.

Here are steps that you can use to help with your self-control around your kids.  The first thing is to always put your children first and make them the most important part of your life.  By doing this, you will eliminate getting angry that them for interrupting your favorite show or sports event on T.V.  Because you can always find a way to replay your shows or events, but there is no replay or take backs in a child’s life.

Always listen to what your child is saying without saying anything first.  This will make your child feel like you are really listening to them and they won’t get frustrated telling you about it.  This will also stop any chances of you reacting to your kids by trying to out guess what they are saying.  When a kid gets frustrated, they stop listening to you and will cause you or your child to lose self-control.  You can still ask questions, but use a non-aggressive voice.

Another step is to have time for just your children and yourself.  By spending time with them you are showing them your love for them and that they are important in your life.  This will also help them respect you more.  Spend time by reading to them or have them read to you, playing games outside or by playing a video game with each other, or even play board games with them.

Self-control will help your child to have good behavior, to be respectful, to be patience, and to have a good attitude towards their peers, adults, and elders.  So the best way to look at this is if you want them to show self-control towards you then you should show self-control towards your kids.

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